Annie in San Francisco shows you how to get it right in mid life!

Q: What inspired you to become a dating coach for midlife singles?
I worked in outside sales for 20 years. I was in a field where I was one of the only women that many midlife men saw during their workday. My customers often confided in me, and asked for advice about their love-lives. Over the years, I got a real man's-eye-view of dating that was very different than what I heard from the women I knew. I was inspired to help both understand each other, and to do my part to bring more love into people's lives. I studied and worked for a year with a mentor. Why midlife? Because there are no role models for midlife singles, and there is a lot of need for someone who understands their issues.

Q: Please tell us a little bit more about your 5 Step Program.
We work with the following issues: Step 1 - Get ready to date--dating fundamentals: This is the most important. Successful dating strategies. Signaling that you're available - image, body language, etc. Preparing for rejection and rejecting. How men and women see dating differently. Setting realistic expectations. Handling baggage. And a host of other issues. Step 2 - Meeting people: How and where to meet people in person. Flirting strategies. The role of chemistry. Giving/getting phone numbers, phone call strategies. Optimum use of technology - online dating, texting, email, etc. Step 3 - First few dates: Dating etiquette. Setting dating boundaries. Appropriate goals and conversation topics for dates 1, 2, 3. Setting reasonable expectations re phone calls, exclusivity, etc. Step 4 - Moving into a relationship: Dealing with sex--when, how to decide, expectations around it. Making sure you're both looking for the same thing. Being prepared for danger-points. Handling commitment issues. Step 5 - Move on or move in: Deciding if this person is the one for you. Deciding upon and implementing your strategy for the future. Dealing with merging household issues in a positive way.

Q: What are some of the biggest dating challenges singles face in their 40s and 50s, and how do you help them overcome those obstacles?
Being easily overwhelmed because of their inexperience. I educate them, so they become as confident about dating as they are about the rest of their lives. Shyness, not believing that there are many available singles in their area. I teach them how to talk to strangers, to meet more people. Being overwhelmed by the feeling of scarcity, so that they become prematurely attached to someone who is not as invested. I coach to continue meeting and looking until a man asks and a woman is ready for commitment. Not understanding how to best use online dating as a technique for meeting people. I work intensively with the details of system - tele seminars and/or private coaching.Believing myths: love will find you if you're not looking, you will just know if someone is right when you first meet them. I help people to understand that love can take time, that if you really want to find love, you have to deal with the reality of dating.

Q: You offer a wide variety of seminars, including a flirting field day. Can you tell us more about that program?
It's really fun! A group of us works on body language and flirting skills for about 90 minutes, then we go to a venue where there are other midlife people and put those skills to work. I'm there to offer advice, support, and sometimes examples.

Q: What are some of the best dating websites for midlife singles?
Mine, of course! http://www.getalovelife.net/ It depends what part of the country you live in, but if you Google dating or singles and midlife and activities, you will discover who puts on activities for singles in your area. For online dating, I have links on http://budurl.com/galldatsit. In general, mainstream sites like match.com or yahoopersonals.com are good. Matchmaking sites like eHarmony or chemistry.com are better for men, because many more midlife women sign up than men do. Also, go to meetup.com and search singles activity groups in your area.

Q: What advice would you give to all those individuals out there who are having a hard time living the single life?
Get out and get involved with friends and social groups. Be proud that you're being proactive in looking for love, and tell all of your friends so that you have their support. Smile (practice, if you don't feel it)- people are attracted to a positive attitude. If you have a hard time getting a positive attitude, try this exercise: every morning, write a list of 5 things that you are grateful for in your life, even if it's only air, water, etc! Talk to strangers every day. 

Q: Best place to meet new people when you are tired or too old for the bar scene?
Learn something new in a group setting - social dancing, golf. Join a group that focuses on a special interest of yours. Volunteer. Before you commit to any of these things, contact the leader and ask about the group demographics - that way, you won't find yourself in a room of twenty-somethings or people who are all your sex.

Q: How can single parents make more room in their lives for dating?
It depends how old your kids are. If they're young, find another single parent who you can trade babysitting with, so that each of you can have a date night each week. If they are in their teens, you'll be dealing with your curfew, as well as your child's. It helps if the other parent is involved. Don't decide to wait until your kids are grown to start dating. Utilize online dating services.

Q: How do you react to singles who express that they feel “too old” to find love?
You are never too old. Some people are just done with it, and that's their decision. However, if they feel lonely, why not connect with someone? Love helps you to live longer, and happier.

Q: Any other words of wisdom?
I give different classes and seminars each month. I always give at least one by phone call. I work with people from all over the country. My coaching really works!