Charlotte

Q: What led you to start writing MyPixieBlog and how has posting your thoughts to the world helped you?
I have always loved writing, but I stopped for 10 years because I let my fears and insecurities take over. While on vacation with the ex in Hawaii, I realized he no longer loved me and I told myself that when I returned I would keep an online journal to chronicle the highs and lows of our breakup. Since I started my blog, many women in similar situations have reached out to me and it's been incredibly therapeutic to discuss matters of the heart with complete strangers (though I consider them all to be my friends now).

Q: You seem to have reclaimed your sense of self by immersing yourself in activities. Can you tell us how yoga and Phish concerts have been instrumental in helping you overcome your last relationship?
At first I sought comfort from these activities because they were welcome distractions. And then I remembered how much I used to love following Phish and meeting people from all parts of the country who were just as devoted to this band as I was. Also, on a somewhat shallow note, Phish shows are full of cute single hippies, and it's nice to have a music connection in common.

Bikram has not only transformed my body, but each time I set foot on the mat I deal with a different internal struggle and I enjoy being able to push through the physical and emotional pain. I think of each class as a manifestation of some of the things life tends to throw in our way.

Q: Many women feel as though life becomes serious after 30. Do you have any lessons learned to share with our readers?
Yes, life becomes serious, and the pressure can seem insurmountable. But I learned to just not give a damn about any of that any longer. Maybe it's weird and irresponsible that I went to 18 Phish shows in one year but I've learned that with only one life to live, it's important we make proper use of our time here. I'm hoping that kids are in my future, but why spend my waking moments worrying about something I have no control over?

Q: Hollywood movies like Sex and the City as well as Eat Pray Love glamorize the single life. What are some of the takeaways you gained from these feature films?
The single life is never as glamorous as it's portrayed in the movies (need proof? Go on a few Match.com dates!). But I have always admired the friendships that the women of SATC share and I'm grateful to be surrounded by such wonderful women (and some great guy friends!).

Eat Pray Love really spoke to me. I mean, who wouldn't want to take nine months to eat through Italy, learn to find total stillness in an Ashram, and find love in Bali? My favorite part of Gilbert's book was her spiritual journey and it's one of the reasons I've tried incorporating meditation into my daily practice.

Q: What do you think men should know about today’s thirty something single woman?
That we freak about marriage just as much as they do. That we also want a "woman cave" to retreat to at the end of the day. That we need a weekend away with the girls as much as they want time with the boys.

Also, women in their 30s are confident, sexy, and have it more or less figured out. This is a good age to catch us. ;)

Q: The pressures of being single are very hard to handle. Any words of wisdom on how to handle social angst?
Humor and deflection seem to have worked for me.

Q: What does your vision of a happy ending look like?
My dreams have taken a different shape over the years. I have learned to place less emphasis on the ceremony of marriage, but I still hold on to hope that I can find someone iwith whom to enjoy the finer moments in life. Because as much as I love to dance, drink wine at sunset and travel, all those moments are made for sharing. A happy ending also involves at least one dog.

Q: Any other words of wisdom?
Communication is always the key to understanding in any relationship. And if you're not happy with your situation? Leave. I know, I make it sound so easy. But I truly was unhappy in that relationship and realized there was more to life than what was being offered.

So until the right one waltzes along, you can find me feeding money into the jukebox at the back of the dive bar or breaking in my Birkenstocks on the lawn at some festival or other. Actually, this time of year I tend to stick around the music venues in the Village. Too damn cold out there for Birks.