Cocktails and Confessions from a Mixologist

I have a confession to make: I love public transportation. You just never know who is going to sit beside you. Several weeks ago, while en-route to a cocktail party, my handsome seat mate happened to be a top mixologist in New York City. Despite what most people including myself would think, I have gotten to know Jerry over the past few weeks and have been amazed that he is sincere, focused and totally down-to-earth.

So before this fabulous Mixologist headed off to travel the world for a year, I wanted to get some behind the bar insights to share with all of you. Here are some of his confessions plus a fresh and delcious cocktail recipe!

Question: You've been working at one of the trendiest New York City bars. Have any celebrities ever come in alone for a cocktail?

Well, obviously many celebrities frequent the bar and there have been a few that have come up to the bar alone, but they tend to come with friends and sit at tables...And although I stopped working there recently, I can't "confess" any names for your readers. They can read Page Six for that. ;)

Question: In terms of hospitality, how do you better service individuals who are at the bar alone?

It depends on what you mean by alone...Very often people get there and are waiting for a friend or a lover who happens to be late. Those types tend to be glued to their Blackberries or cell phones. I am always welcoming to them but you can feel their energy saying, "Why is my friend not on time!..." Now for the people who truly come solo to my bar, you can usually sense their desire to connect on some level, so I'll take it from there and start getting to know these individuals to help them feel more comfortable in the environment. And then,after a few drinks, they start talking with everyone around them...Hopefully not annoying them though...that's not cool!

Question: Clearly you have lots of regulars. What is your favorite memory or conversation with a stranger?

It happened a few months ago. This guy came in, sat alone and ordered a margarita. I wasn't busy so we just started talking about life, my upcoming travels, etc. After a while he revealed to me that he came in to celebrate some recent success in his life which he explained to me in detail (To keep him anonymous, I can't let you in on the details). The mood in the air was one of total excitement and optimism on both our parts. I made him a couple more tequila based cocktails and we continued to share our experiences in the world. He told me he was going to bring his wife in the following Thursday for their 10-year anniversary. Unlike a lot of people in New York City who say one thing and do another, he was a stand-up guy and actually did come in that night. I met his wife and made them a few signature drinks before they went off to a nice dinner. It may not sound like anything extraordinary to the people reading this, but to me it is a testament to what it truly means to live in a world with other human beings. Those moments in life when strangers become friends will never get old for me...

Question: Do you think it is becoming more acceptable to grab a drink at a bar alone, especially in such a trendy spot?

Well, you are asking someone who is about to embark on a solo journey around the globe for a year, so from my point of view, it is perfectly acceptable to do most things alone. But to answer your question, I honestly believe it is OK to go to a bar alone (trendy or not), but it totally depends on the person and how comfortable he/she feels doing so. Unfortunately, there will always be those people who think it's odd, but that's their problem, not yours.

Question: How can individuals better prepare themselves if they are alone at a bar? Any good conversation starters or tips?

I'm not sure there is any preparation involved. People are either comfortable with putting themselves in a social situation where they are alone or they are not. I guess my only tip is to not get too "twisted" (drunk) and make a fool of yourself, because you won't have a friend to apologize to others on your behalf.

Question: What are some of the best and worst pick up lines you have heard while tending bar?

Do people really still use pick up lines?? I can't recall any good ones. Although I do have one funny story of something one should NOT do. I had this guy ask me to go up to two very attractive ladies at the bar and tell them he'd like to buy them a bottle of Cristal. I popped the bottle open and served it up to them. They gave him a thank you nod, drank half a glass and then left the bar. My advice: if you feel a good vibe from someone, just go up to them, say hi and introduce yourself. Then "let the cards fall where they may..."

Question: When it comes to entertaining guests, what is your best kept behind the bar secret that individuals should know about?

Give people free drinks... ;-) Seriously, my secret (I wouldn't really call it a secret) is this, and it's not something that can be taught. You really have to love entertaining others. You have to infuse everything you do, every cocktail you concoct, every meal you prepare with that loving energy. Trust me! It really does come through. A recipe is just words and numbers on a piece of paper. The environment you create, the way you go about preparing something and presenting it to your guests is what matters most. It is a holistic experience that has the ability to affect others in a special way.

Question: I hear you are single. And clearly, good looking. Do you get hit on all the time while on the job?

Why thank you for the compliment. I would have to say yes to that question, but not all the time. I also work with other good looking guys so they get some serious attention as well.

Question: What is your favorite cocktail and why?

Wow. That's a tough one. It depends on the season for me...So since it is Spring and Summer is approaching, a well made classic Margarita always hits the spot. And please, please! Use fresh lime juice...Leave the sour mix where it belongs...back at the manufacturing plant.

Question: Can you share one of your signature drinks in a single serve portion?

I don't have a name for this one, but I think it is tasty for this time of year.

-6 leaves of fresh basil
-1/4 ounce agave nectar (1/2 oz if you want it a touch sweeter)
-1/2 ounce fresh lime juice
-1/2 ounce Green Chartreuse
-1.5 ounces El Jimador Blanco tequila

Prep: First muddle very lightly the basil and agave nectar. Then add the lime juice, Green Chartreuse and tequila. Add ice, shake well and then strain over crushed ice in a rock glass. Garnish with a lime wheel and basil sprig.

BIO.

Jerry Stilianessis has just recently embarked on a travel adventure around the world. You may have seen him the last couple of years shaking up cocktails as the head bartender of the Rose Bar in the Gramercy Park Hotel. He is a graduate of Boston University with a degree in Hospitality Administration. In addition, feeding his passions for creativity, health and consciousness, Jerry is a trained actor as well as a Holistic Health Counselor, receiving his training from The Institute for Integrative Nutrition, which is affiliated with Columbia University's Teachers College. You can learn more about him and contact him through his Myspace page. http://www.myspace.com/jerrynessis