For Madam X Normalcy in New York is all about Saving not Spending!

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Q: Where do you live?
I live in beautiful Brooklyn, NY. I used to be in a neighborhood called Park Slope which is kind of famous for being overrun with yuppie couples pushing strollers, but now I'm a bit further out in Sunset Park where there seems to be more of a mix between young single people and families.

Q: What’s the biggest accomplishment you achieved on your own?
Buying a home on my own was a pretty big accomplishment. But I have to say that I'm also proud of having taught myself to cook, after several years of living with someone who did all the cooking for me! (I washed the dishes.)

Q: What inspired you to start writing about how much you spend, earn and save?
I realized how important financial security is to me, and how much concerns about money have driven the decisions I've made in life. I also felt that New Yorkers are prone to just excusing their bad money habits by saying "the cost of living is so high here, of course I'm broke!" I think New Yorkers focus too much on the spending habits of Wall Streeters and lose track of what people elsewhere might see as a "normal life", so I wanted to share my experiences from a more middle-class perspective and show that it's possible to make ends meet here even if you're not wealthy.

Q: How can singles avoid paying more than their portion of the bill when they are dining out in groups or with couples?
This is a tough one, but I'd recommend keeping a mental tally of what you've consumed and how much your share of the tax and tip should be. Then you can just smile and say "I think mine should be about $xxx, does that sound right?" But this method requires a good head for quick math, which can be tough after a few drinks!

Q: What are some of the biggest challenges singles face when it comes to saving?
I think housing is a big one. A young couple may be perfectly happy to share a one-bedroom apartment, or even a studio, but if you're single and want any degree of privacy, you're going to have to pay more to have your own bedroom. It's also much easier to travel as part of a couple, as travel deals are usually based on double occupancy. But on the flip side, singles have an edge in saving money in a few ways-- I think couples can be very prone to a sort of lifestyle inflation. You move in together, you do the nesting thing, you compare your lifestyle to that of other couples-- that can be a big temptation to spend money. And then there's the wedding and honeymoon-- unless you're lucky enough to have your parents pay for the whole thing, that's a huge expense, even if you do end up getting a lot of cash gifts too! And let's not even talk about how expensive it is to have children!

Q: You seem to have developed a list of financial rules to live by. Which one best applies to singles and why?
Rule 10 is probably a good candidate: "Make Enough Money." I think the key thing when you're single is to reconcile yourself to being independent. Women, especially, can sometimes think being young and single is just about killing time until a husband comes along to manage the money. Yes, some people are still that old fashioned! I am a firm believer in living like you're single even when you're not, and that means knowing what your needs are and being realistic about what you have to do to pay for them. That means taking charge of your career, because no one else is going to do it for you!

Q: Do you have any cost-friendly dating spots our readers should know about?
I've always tended to have first dates over a glass of wine and maybe an appetizer-- it's cheaper than committing yourself to a whole dinner if you're not sure how it's going to go. Once you know the person better, New York is full of fun and cheap things to do on a date-- ride the free Staten Island Ferry at night for a beautiful view of the skyline and the Statue of Liberty, or have a picnic in Central Park. Ride bikes up the path along the Hudson River and stop for hot dogs, or go to a free reading at a bookstore and then discuss it afterwards at a 24-hour diner. Feel free to adapt to your own place of residence!

Q: When it comes to cooking for one, how can individuals do so without over-spending on bulk food items?
I find this very difficult! Sometimes I think it's better to just resign yourself to shopping a couple times a week and only buying what you'll actually eat, so you won't waste food. Otherwise, you have to make friends with your freezer! Lately, I've been buying some chicken breasts that come in individual plastic packs-- they're not the cheapest and the packaging isn't environmentally friendly, but I find that they stay fresh much longer, and it's easy to just pull one out of the freezer in the morning, put it in the fridge, and have it ready to cook that night. If I were a little less lazy, I'd just buy a big pack of chicken and wrap up the individual breasts myself! But I also try to make extra portions of meat sauce for pasta to keep in the freezer, and I freeze loaves of bread for making toast. The key thing is to think a little further ahead, and not to get too bored by eating the same thing two nights in a row from time to time! But don't beat yourself up about buying small portions or ordering takeout sometimes-- one trick I have is to order an extra side dish or two with a take out entree. Often entree portions are so big that you'll be fine just eating half if you extend the meal a little with a side dish. Then use the leftovers for the next day's lunch!

Q: Any financial tools or resources we should know about?
My favorite tool is Quicken, used in conjunction with Pocket Quicken on my Treo. I track every penny I spend, which I'd never manage to do without being able to enter it on my phone. It then synchronizes the transactions with the desktop version of Quicken. I think being able to track expenses, budgeting, investment performance and net worth is extremely important. When you're aware of what you're spending, it helps you stay in control. And when you see your net worth increasing each month (hopefully!) it's great positive reinforcement and makes you want to save even more.

Q: Any more words of wisdom?
I would just say that single people should enjoy their financial freedom! We don’t have the stresses of trying to negotiate a shared household budget or a joint checking account. We make our own money and we decide how to spend it, how to save it, and how to invest it. We are independent and in control— and that is the best position to be in to achieve financial security.

To read more from Madam X, check out her blog My Open Wallet: A Personal Finance Blog About Money and Life in New York

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