In Need of a Breath Saver

Q: I have been dating my boyfriend for six months. He's a great guy, the relationship is going well, but he has terrible breath. The kind that permeates the air. It's almost impossible for me to imagine a way to tell him without hurting his feelings, but at the same time, it affects the way I behave around him - I am less affectionate and avoid intimacy. What should I do?

I understand your hesitation to tell your boyfriend about his bad breath but do you really have a choice if you want the reationship to continue and thrive? It sounds like you are so turned off by the smell that the intimacy in the relationship is suffering. The primary question is, does your boyfriend have good oral hygiene? Does he brush, floss and have regular dental cleanings? If he does, then perhaps his bad breath may be an indication of a medical problem (somethng for a physician to address).

A healthy relationship is based upon honesty and trust. You've been dating this person for 6 months now and you think he's a great guy. It sounds like you might have a good foundation on which to take the risk of finding a way to tell him, gently and truthfully, how well things are going, yet also discuss the situation you are running into regarding his breath. Approach it as a team, not as if you're attacking him. Be as posititve as you can and ask for his suggestions, too. Your boyfriend might be relieved that you care enough to bring this topic to him. Without discussing this issue together, affection may continue to decrease and resentment increase-try to talk.

DISCLAIMER: This format is general in nature and not intended as a personal response to each question nor is it a subtitute for individualized medical or psychological care, diagnosis or treatment.

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