Online Safety Alert

Q: Hi, I am a 22 year old Catholic woman who will be finishing up with college in Dallas at the end of the semester.  I will be moving back to New Jersey to live with my parents. I am sure they will be trying to fix me up when I return home but I would also like to try an Internet matchmaking service. How can I convince my old fashioned folks that this is a safe option for me?

Hello,

Congratulations on earning your college degree. Internet matchmaking is still a hard-to-grasp concept for many people from your parents’ generationwho have deeply embedded religious and cultural courting traditions, so don’t expect a shift in perception to happen overnight. Instead, I suggest that you slowly introduce the concept to your parents and point out the benefits that online dating services are delivering to the community.

For starters, explain to them that sites like CatholicPeopleMeet.com and CatholicSinglesMingle.com are community-based websites which have been established with the purpose of helping people like yourself find a life mate who shares the same background as you. In addition, many of today’s young men and women are subscribing to online dating sites in search of matrimony, so their intentions are serious. At some point it may be a good idea for you to show your parents some of the success stories, i.e. couples who have met and married as a result of these Internet dating services. You can click here to see some real life examples but you can find plenty more on each of the respective websites.

As for safety, every reputable dating site has a customer service representative 24/7 with whom you can interact via telephone or virtually to report trolls, scammers or anyone who may be pestering or seems dangerous to you. But while there are built-in mechanisms to protect members, part of the onus is on you. If you all agree to move forward with an online search, here are some online safety rules to keep in mind:

Cross Check References: If you want to verify background and the accuracy of a candidate’s profile, Google is your best tool. One quick search on a person’s name and there is a good chance their Facebook and LinkedIn pages will pop up. This will allow you to see whether or not their professional credentials are accurate as well as the type of social circles they belong to and how they comport themselves.

Look for the Photos: Although most candidates who do not post their profile pictures are not dangerous suspects, you’re safer off staying away from them. The reason is because you never know if they are who they say they are or if they are searching behind a significant partner’s back.

Be Public about First Encounters: You can ask individuals to meet your parents before the date and always insist that you meet in a public place such as a restaurant or coffee shop. Be sure to tell your parents or a friend where you are heading and touch base with them at some point during the date.

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