Single and Satisfied

Q: Best Solo Activity?

The tanning salon. I recently started tanning after a 7 year hiatus and I love it. It is a great unwind at the end of the day. I get to relax, nap or simply get lost in my thoughts. I love the warmth of the beds and the smell of my lotion! It isn't something that you do as a group…or as a couple…you go by yourself. So while I'm there, I'm not single. I'm not alone. I'm me, tan.

Q: Perfect Spot?
In my experience, I have met a lot of new people at church. If you asked some of my long time friends they would tell you that I have been known to say “Church is the worst place for meeting people, guys especially. Think about it…When you go to church, you are all dressed up, on your best behavior, and basically “hide” the real you. You are supposed to behave at CHURCH…so you're not going to cuss or shout or display your bad habits! I think meeting someone at church is worse than meeting someone at a bar…at least a bar you get something “real” even if it is real drunk or real desperate!” And now I grin thinking about the “real” people I have met in various groups I have become involved in at church. I should say that I attend a large church, we have a gym, a library, an atrium, and about 20 adult Sunday School classes. I started attending this church because it had a singles group, more specifically a divorce recovery group…I was pretty skeptical, as I had been divorced for 2 years, however, I was quickly shocked and then amazed that in this group (which grew from 13 to 30) I made dear friends… Friends that are different from my married friends and my never been married friends; girls and guys that were single like me, but unlike other “single” friends, were dealing with similar issues and trials and triumphs in their lives.

Q: Best Restaurant?
I don't mind going just about anywhere solo…but I have developed a special attraction to a restaurant with a bar. It seems there is always a seat at the bar. The bartender who waits on you is your fast friend. Your drink is always fresh, your food is hot and you don't want for anything. Even when the bar is busy, he checks on you several times. And if the bar is slow, he stops and chats. When he brings you the check, he seems genuinely disappointed that you are leaving but knows you'll be back.

Q: Words to Live By?
Simple minds seek convoluted scenarios while brilliant minds achieve simplicity. JMC

Q: What do you love about being single?
Spur of the moment camping trips, always eating what you are in the mood for, rolling over and over and over in a king size bed, arriving when you want and leaving when you are ready, not sharing a bathroom, always having control of the remote, vacuuming at 1am, not having to check with anyone prior to making happy hour plans, staying up all night watching terrible movies, listening to your favorite song on repeat, using all the hot water for your shower, and that you can almost always find ONE seat at the bar!

Q: Other Advice:
That selfish is not the same as self-absorbed. That setting boundaries can protect you from others and yourself. That there are some things on which I just will not compromise. That it is okay to not answer that phone call, text message, or email. That if you are going to rock the boat, you better know how to swim. To hold your friends accountable for their actions, and expect the same from them.