Stuck at The Single’s Table: Save Yourself Amidst the Bliss

Great food, free booze and an evening of dancing, how could anyone ask for a better Saturday night out? From the perfectly manicured flowers right down to the martini bar nothing can change your mind, not even the endless supply of little cocktail wieners wrapped in flakes of crispy dough that awaits your arrival. It’s a party most people prefer not to miss but you are dreading it.

Weddings are the most joyous occasion in a person’s life unless you’re destined for the hinterlands, cordoned off at the single’s table where it’s you, the couple’s “Cousin It” and other stragglers. Having been there done that before (more than 30 times but who’s counting) I feel your pain. But I survived and am here to tell you the lessons I learned from getting stuck at the single’s table.

1.       Going Stag is better than Taking a Drag: The respectable couple has extended a “plus one” invitation and you’re determined to find someone, anyone, to be your escort? Before you get overwrought with panic consider the worst case scenarios like the diva who busts out with Elaine’s moves on the dance floor or the neighbor who just moved in next to you that gets drunk and greets your friends/relatives with a mouthful of food.  The one thing I learned about going solo is that there is no shame at the end of the night. 

2.      One Person’s Date May be Another Person’s Trophy:  All those happy loving couples that make weddings look so easy may not actually be romantic partners.  Don’t be shy about stating that you are single, one never know who may be eavesdropping from another table. And always keep in mind that the drag someone else brought along (see #1 for reference) may be your perfect treasure.

3.       Get Up and Dance Like No One Is Watching:  Staying glued to your seat gives off the impression that’s the place you want to be. Why wait for a brave soul to pull you away? Put yourself out there even if it means join in for the Horah or waving your hands up in the air for the chicken dance. Moving with the group is one of the best ways to meet guests and relatives from the “other side” who may be stuck in some far-away corner at a separate single’s table.   

4.    Keep it light, they’re pouring drinks all night: Women fighting over the flowers during the bridal toss; a special toast by a toasted you; a loud “disagreement” with another guest? Just some of the ugly situations you should try to avoid. It’s easy to lose control amidst the matrimonial madness, particularly if you make the bar your safe haven. Just remember too one too many beverages and all eyes will be on you rather than the bride.  

Sometimes, you have to smile, even though your heart is faking it. Weddings are no exception, but the chance of enjoying yourself, and perhaps meeting someone new, can only be enhanced if you keep these tips in mind and embrace the opportunity these occasions present.

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